All Mine- 2012

 I have seen something else under the sun: The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favor to the learned; but time and chance happen to them all.

Ecclesiastes 9:11

We have come to the beginning of a New Year and never have I been so excited about it! Embarking on new adventures and not backing down. Staying motivated and conquering each and every endeavor! I claim this year as MINE! I'm not quite sure what to expect, but whatever God does I know it's perfect and in His will! Before I wanted to be married and graduate college this year, not saying those things won't happen, but those are not my goals for this year. My goal is to please God, and not only that, but to stop sleeping on some of these dreams and ideas that I so often play with and think about.

Before I faced a lot of fear and DOUBT, and not being quite sure how to go about the things that were placed on my heart. The funny part is, I know my resources! But it was the DOUBT I had that really played a part in it! And with doubt I LOST focus. I never realized how much I doubted myself before 2011 (thanks to Obsessed). With my singing, dancing/miming, writing, and my ideas. I became consumed with what everybody else was doing and how they were accomplishing it and while focusing on them I lost myself!


I've learned that my journey in this life is different from everyone elses. Let's be quite frank, most of the people I was watching were going on the SAME journey! Nobody was there own. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, but I was expected to travel that road with them. But, unlike some people, I was too busy questioning myself and trying to figure out if that journey was God's will for my life. Better yet, I was trying to figure out if this is what I really wanted, and if not, what did I want.


2012 is here, and I am still not quite sure what I want or what's going to happen, but my spirit is done with competing; and I know there's something better instored for me this year! Literally, I just feel it in this leaping spirit of mine! I don't want your journey. I want to personally sign my journey with the setback, with the challenges I face and so forth! Don't get me wrong, I am not saying these people didn't go through anything, I don't know their story. But I've taken my focus OFF of people. That alone was a setback, people! Watching what they did, why it's not happening for me, caring what they may have thought of me and etc...


Like the title says 2012 IS MINE! I can't hold back anymore! I'm ready to take all! I've allowed distractions to come, and I have allowed myself to loose focus. And to be quite frank, it brought me to a breaking point and heighten my humility. So I know whatever is accomplished from here on out (not to exclude before) in my life is only by the HELP, the GRACE, the MERCY, and FAVOR of GOD!


The verse Ecclesiastes 9:11 is only an expression of how I'm going to achieve what God has planned for me and will allow me to accomplish. Because like I said, I was so caught up with what my peers and others around me were doing, I wanted to be where they are. Yet alone, I was bombarded with what I needed to get done as well. But God knows what He's doing. He watched me try to accomplish what He knew was too much for me. He watched me get caught up with the things I so badly wanted to be a part of and still carried me through.


2012, I don't know what to expect, but GREATER this year! Like I said before, God is not carrying me through HELL if GREATER is not PREPARED for ME!

Sidebar: 2012- The year of Establishment and Government (perfect) <<<<< A friend asked me what was my goal for 2012 and I told him "To get on my 2 feet..." and that when I remembered what the number 12 means! It's funny how God aligns us with HIS word!

Grand Exit Into A Grand Entry

(I’ve never written a “testimonial/declaration” as such as this one. But this is what 2011 challenged me with! I’ve always been the one people looked up to, and keeping that image this year was tough. I may have kept it up. I don’t know and I don’t care. The fact is I made it another year ALIVE and God by my side! Like you’re about to read, 2011 was tough. I don’t explain it all, and some of it wasn’t even that bad, but its what I dealt with internally. I don’t tell people much of my frustration with life, school, church, and even God. But I decided to let you all peek in just a little. And if you follow me on twitter, I’m sure you’ve observed there! Lol But anyway, I hope my little testimony and declaration sheds some light on your own situation and that you decide to move on to GREATER with me! BUT, don’t forget to bring GOD with you! HE has all the Greatness; therefore, being in relationship with HIM is the only way we will be able to reach it! ….. Now, READ ON!)

2011 you have been the most challenging year I have faced in my life! Can you say "BOOT CAMP 2011!" Not because of money issues, not because of problems on the job, but my relationship with Christ was attacked and not only that but my relationship with MYSELF was attacked too! It was to the point I was so consumed with work, school AND church I didn't even realized God existed and who I was. Praying, Loving, Being Thankful, and Acknowledging HIM daily like I should was occupied with: "what do I have to do today" "if I don't do this, this will happen" "I have to do this, otherwise he/she will be upset with me".

There were times it seemed like I was running around looking like a "chickens head cut off!" I lost balance, I lost sense of who I was, I was afraid of disappointing others, while all at the same time trying to take care of Whitney. When I should've been facing God and asking Him to carry me through and take care of me!

And yes, some of it I blame on myself! I took on some loads that were too heavy for my back until it got to the point I came a bit absent minded and not even caring anymore! I struggled with school, hurting people, losing commitment; which caused the value of who I was to be degraded. There were even people I was hurt by and confused about. And til this day I'm still confused about!

Don't get me wrong! We had a few awesome days! Days I'll never forget and I had victories that put me in awe! BUT, 2012 I plan to conquer A LOT MORE than what I did in 2011! There's GREATER prepared! HOWEVER, I refuse to go out of 2011 feeling defeated! With that said, I'm preparing for a GRAND EXIT, but only to make a GRAND ENTRY into 2012!

2012, you will be my year, I've been claiming you all of 2011 and I've been in anticipation for you! I may not accomplish all I had in mind for 2012, but my mindset will not be defaulted! As me and a friend like to say "I'm getting my life together" I have EXPECTATIONS and GREATER is my mindset! I’m not one to make resolutions, or one to say I’m going to change and do all this boastful talking about the New Year, but I will BE BETTER and I will DO BETTER!

This year I won’t wait for advice from family and friends and prophetic words from the preacher. I’ll chase God down with my prayers, and use the common sense He gave me too! I know there’s a “new journey” in life waiting for me. And I embarked on it this year, I took risk and challenges, I had some failures and setbacks. There were some detours and I got lost! But in 2012 we will proceed to move forward.

2012 I will not compromise who I am, I can’t allow that to happen! Because someone is waiting for me to screw up good, someone is waiting to take my place, and I REFUSE TO LET GO: of my purpose, of my destiny, and of my dreams. A stronger passion has been created, a stronger initiative is on the move, and I won’t wait any longer to apply my dream into my reality!

Going Steady

My blog doesn't have to be composed of sentences on top of sentences and bundles of paragraphs perfectly framed to fit the page.

Where I break in my sentence is where I please and if I decided to use ain't instead of isn't, then that's fine too.

We get consumed with presentation, when for me my mind is just consumed with getting the thought down.

Forget words that include 10 consonants and all vowels into one word. Just give me something simple, such as this thought I have here...

"Going Steady"

I been fighting eith presentation

I been fighting with wording

Of how I want to present this blog and how I wanted to say it

But it came out as a headache

And as I rested my head for God to lay me down to sleep, I pray my soul He keeps...

The thoughts began to form...

"Going Steady"

There's no need to rush

Pace yourself, and it will all get accomplished

Quit playing catch up and keep your focus

Don't make it to the finish line before your time

And if you do, be prepared to not be well equipped

Get what you need

"GO STEADY"

It'll be there waiting for you

Process what you have

Don't look at what others have because God didn't create you as your "neighbor"

Focus on what He gave you to use and stop borrowing

GO STEADY

Take Gods hand and He'll lead the way

Most of us have gone so long without holding His hand...

It's time to turn back now

Pray, Fast, Read HIS Word

GO STEADY

You don't want to end up in something you're not ready for

He'll show you how to get there

GO STEADY

There I said it! #RELIEVED

I Trust You

All night I been trying to get my thoughts ready to write on "Going Study." But this "I Trust You" idea keeps battling it out. SO I guess I'll just go with it.

I Trust You
I have never heard those words ring in my ear like I heard this week
It's almost like the phrase "I love you"
But, truth be told, "I trust you" seems to hold a greater depth
In the bible it tells us to trust no man (Psalm146:3, Matthew 6:24)
And prior to understanding that
I battled in previous relationships with having trust
Through my love, I showed I trusted them
Never did I tell him
But, as soon as he broke my heart it was
"I don't trust you no more!"
SO, to hear those words was unfamiliar to my ear
Especially from someone you least expected to express such an emotion
It's not that I don't feel trusted
I've seen it shown and expressed several times through leadership, relationships, and friendships
But this time the ring from this bell sounded different this time
"I trust you"

Stand Still

The year is waning away and I currently feel like I'm at a stand still
I know when you go on a journey there's going to be a few rain clouds
A few rainbows, world disasters and other hinderances
But this stand still really seems like it's in the way
It's like fog coming in patches
As soon as I go in one direction
BAM...Fog
I'm not sure quite where I'm going
I'm waiting for phone calls
I'm waiting for decisions to be made
And until I can get those responses
This hault is holding me back
Just when I thought I saw one door open
BAM, as soon as I walked to it
 It's shut, nailed to the frame
So while I'm standing still
It's only necessary to seek God
Like the verse, that so many song writers sing, Psalm 46:10
Deitrick Haddon song says it well,
"Stand still and know that He is God, and there's no need to fight, for the battle is not yours, the battle is the Lords"
But while I'm waiting, I need something to do
Then I think about the verse "Pray without ceasing..." (1 Thessalonians 5:17)
So, I'm standing still...
I'm knowing He's God
And I'm praying...
And BAM, the realization hits me of the GREATNESS of GOD
Without standing still, I would've walked passed God and all His splendor
Therefore, I'll just keeping "Standing Still"

Because we are one..

Into my mind
Into my body
Into my spirit
Into my soul
Your love has made residence
You now abide in me
Every inch of your flesh
Has journeyed into my being
You're now flowing into my bloodstream
And because of this
We are made one
You set your sight on me
You set your mind on me
Your heart was just ready
To conquer all of me
You journey beyond my gaze
And entered into my soul
And now we are one
I am your rib
You are my backbone
And because of your support
I am stronger than before
And because I am by your side
No one can defeat our bond
Because we are one...

The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

It seems that maybe I should go into the field of Marriage/Relationship Counseling, because based on some of the books I've been reading the knowledge really sticks with me. Unlike this Professional Communication major I am studying.

Recently, I just finished reading "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. I must say, it was a great read and at the moment, lately I've been sizing up everybodys love language. And it has been an interesting observation.

Mainly, those who will probably read this book are either in a relationship, engaged, or married. I am neither, but it has giving me some guidance on how I should love my S.O. as an individual, and not just us as a couple. It's funny because I am anxious to love a person now in their love language.

So, as I venture out, I won't just love a person because it's the right thing to do, but I want to love them according to what makes them feel loved. And this is just not in a relationship. But you can view it as loving your family members in their love language and/or your friends. Ha! And maybe your enemies too.

Hmmm, I guess you're wondering the 5 Love Languages are? Well, I suggest you read it for yourself. And by the way, there are dialects too!