RED ALERTS When Dating (Writing In The Works aka Incomplete)

Ladies! This is for you! We all want to marry our version of "BOAZ" and in order to be appropriately ready we have to already "BE" what we want our version of "BOAZ" to be! Makes sense right! So just a reminder, make sure you're preparing yourself as "RUTH". But, that's not what I'm here for. I just have some thoughts I want to get out regarding dating.

1. If he can't verbally express to you OR show you what he's passionate about, his dreams, goals, and aspirations; along with who he hopes to be one day *RED ALERT* If you see he's only doing enough for the present tense ladies, question that, ask him what he's doing to secure his future.

2. If he's not interested in knowing more about you, your interest, respecting who you are and what you're going for in life *RED ALERT* Maybe I'm asking for too much, but if he's attracted to you, he should also be interested and questioning you about the things you do.

3. If he's a step backwards from what you've had before *RED ALERT*

4. If he's expecting you to do all of these "special" duties for him, but he's not giving in return *RED ALERT*

#ThePassionOfTheDefender

Naturally I like to refute or somehow play the devils advocate, I don't always do (not many people know this part of me), but when I do I'm very stubborn about it, and no matter how much you prove yourself, I'm still right AND most times I am right (I get that 'know it all syndrome' from my mother)! lol I've always been like that, I guess that's why grandaddy says I should be a lawyer!
I also find myself at times defending people who I know have been in some sort of fault, but deserve the benefit of the doubt. I guess this is where that unconditional love comes in that Jesus tells us to have for his people. Because I see myself still caring for people whom I've seen church people detach themselves from because they were "not in the will of God" therefore because they were not following God's will or willing to help them to get in his will, they neglected them.

I don't know how this post came to be, just a random tangent in my thoughts on this lovely Friday mornig June 29, 2012 at 1:34am :)

"That Girl"

We all have our group of "haters"
Some of us may call them "motivators"
And women,
We all know there this sector
Of young and old women
Who just have it out for you
Envy is what it is,
But when they see you coming
They begin slandering
"Who SHE think....."
"Oh! No SHE didn't..."
"Did you see what SHE...."
As though they have forgotten your name
But then it changes to
"Look at HER..."
"I saw HER with..."
"Did you know HER..."

Well, I'm not here to talk about
Female Drama
I just ran across a memory of my Grandma Ann-Lee Petticolas
She was a Mothers Day baby
And about 10 years ago
She passed away

I never saw much of her
And after her death I regretted it a bit
But just by her Homegoing
I learned soo much about her beauty

The memory I hold close to me are her Christmas Cards
And in those cards you would find a 2 dollar bill
One year with my card and 2 dollar bill
She signed it "That Girl"
*laughs*
Yes, she could not remember my name

You would think that would hurt me
But I knew grandma was old
15 plus grandchildren
And on top of it,
I wasn't around much...
But whenever I was around
And she couldn't remember my name
It was
"That Girl"

I started the post off the way I did because
"That girl"
Sounds like something a "hater" may say
When they are talking about you

Grandma was no hater
In her words
"I LOVE ALL Y'ALL"

"That Girl"
Is my special way of remembering her
To some degree it's almost a humbling statement

(Conversation with grandma)

You know "That Girl"
Troy daughter....
"That Girl"

(LOL)

Grandma Ann-Lee,
I am "That Girl..."

WE HAVE COME TO BE DANCED

Found this on Tracee Ellis Ross facebook page and LOVED IT

We HAVE COME TO BE DANCED
by Jewel Mathieson

We have come to be danced
not the pretty dance
not the pretty pretty, pick me, pick me dance
but the claw our way back into the belly
of the sacred, sensual animal dance
... the unhinged, unplugged, cat is out of its box dance
the holding the precious moment in the palms
of our hands and feet dance

We have come to be danced
not the jiffy booby, shake your booty for him dance
but the wring the sadness from our skin dance
the blow the chip off our shoulder dance
the slap the apology from our posture dance

We have come to be danced
not the monkey see, monkey do dance
one, two dance like you
one two three, dance like me dance
but the grave robber, tomb stalker
tearing scabs & scars open dance
the rub the rhythm raw against our souls dance

WE have come to be danced
not the nice invisible, self conscious shuffle
but the matted hair flying, voodoo mama
shaman shakin’ ancient bones dance
the strip us from our casings, return our wings
sharpen our claws & tongues dance
the shed dead cells and slip into
the luminous skin of love dance

We have come to be danced
not the hold our breath and wallow in the shallow end of the floor dance
but the meeting of the trinity: the body, breath & beat dance
the shout hallelujah from the top of our thighs dance
the mother may I?
yes you may take 10 giant leaps dance
the Olly Olly Oxen Free Free Free dance
the everyone can come to our heaven dance

We have come to be danced
where the kingdom’s collide
in the cathedral of flesh
to burn back into the light
to unravel, to play, to fly, to pray
to root in skin sanctuary
We have come to be danced
WE HAVE COME

The Freelancer With No _______????

Now, I advise you to hold on to your seats, because this church girl is about to make a terrible confession.......................................................................................................................................
MY FAITH IS NOT THE SIZE OF A MUSTARD SEED

:(

One thing I struggle with as a believer is my FAITH, yep, that's right! I know God is real I've seen Him work miracles! HECK, I should have been dead about 4 years ago but HE spared my life. But sometimes, probably like any other "normal" saint, I struggle with Faith. I ask God if He's real? I ask God if He's really going to do it. And there have even been times I told myself I'm not going to believe anymore, but I end up talking to Him driving up and down 460. So I have not been successful, PRAISE GOD!

So, right now my prayer is INCREASE MY FAITH! I see it work in everyone elses lives, but sometimes it just seems it comes short when I compare it to my life. There have been times I speak about "Leaping Faith" and I see it come to pass, but my faith has not always been consistent. I get like Thomas sometimes, and I begin to doubt! Sad right? But to me, it shows that I am human, and that my relationship with God is still growing and that I am maturing in Him.

Don't get it mixed up, I know Jesus is real! It's just the Faith for Him to do the Impossible seem to waver at times. But again I'm praying for God to increase my faith and to make it strong!

In conclusion, we all struggle with something when it comes to our relationship with Christ, whether it be faith, love, joy, etc... I just think it's funny that mine is faith, because I've been told I'm a freelancer AND I want to be a business owner, that sounds like a lot of risk taking, which requires, not just talent, but faith!

School & Work

A lot has happened! And this pass Spring Semester I took off of school to re-evaluate some of the places I wanted to be in my life. A lot of people don't know I withdrew, only my immediate family. So please don't smack me if you're reading this post. And along with that I felt it was necessary and time I leave my job at the YMCA. Again, please do not smack me! No, I didn't have a job lined up for me, and as soon as that happened, I found out I owed the school money before I could register for summer classes. But with all my brainstorming, I have worked things out. But in the mist of working things out I realize something I don't EVER do, unless it's my dad, and that's ask for help! Terrible right? I know of family members and even friends that woulod be more than glad to assist, but my independant nature got the best of me! I guess that's one reason why granny never says she doesn't worry soo much about me because she know I can handle it.

But in this path I'm taking I'm quite excited; however, I will say it working my patience and my faith (but that's another post, so be on the look out.)

Anyway, back to the whole school situation! I withdrew from school and I am happy I did it because now I feel more excited, refreshed, and motivated about going back for the summer! I only have 9 classes left, so I'm quite sure this will be a breeze. It's funny though because I am sure people are a bit shocked at some of the decisions I make, but at the end of the day I am living for myself and God! My happiness doesn't come from what other people want from me, but what God desires to get the glory out of, that's where my JOY comes from!

Now about the job, that's another story, but I won't talk about that publicly, nothing bad at all, just felt that it was time to move and to seek after something better and GREATER.

Finally, I will say this, people won't understand every move you make, and you shouldn't have to always explain, especially when it comes to ministry and your relationship with Christ. If God says move, with or without a job, your duty is to move. And don't doubt it, because if God says move, that means HE has provisions already to provide your every NEED until HE moves you out again and better equipped!

When You're Misunderstood

When you're misunderstood
It's hard for people to respect you
At first they may laugh
But when they realize it
Everything you do and say makes sense

When you're misunderstood
No one has ideas like you do
Or can carry them out like you can

When you're misunderstood
You're quickly to be underestimated
And even you have doubts about yourself

When you're misunderstood
Only faith can guide you

When you're misunderstood
There several times you'll just keep your mouth shut
And time where you'll cry alone

When you're misunderstood
Your number of friends are few
And the ones you do have
Seem to come and go

When you're misunderstood
Prepare to be rejected

When you're misunderstood
Sometimes the only person it seems you could work for is yourself

When you're misunderstood
You carry and you see more
More than what others may think

When you're misunderstood
The only person to encourage you is yourself
So don't give up

When you're misunderstood
God sends those faithful few
That will carry you through

When you're misunderstood
Know that God has a plan
That bigger than mans imagination
That they're unable to grasp His wonder and His work

When you're misunderstood
It's not that you're any less or better
But God has plan to do with you, that others can't do...